Erica

At the end of 2012 I felt like my life was falling apart. I had lost my home, my dogs, my weight which I have always had problems with was getting out of control again, and I was struggling to understand why all of this was happening to me and my family. We should have had a home because you are guaranteed that when you are military family. We should have had money because you are guaranteed that when you are a military family. I was scared and thousands of miles away from home. I was scared and my health was getting worse because of it. I had a migraine at least two days a week and started being in pain with something I did not even finally get answer for until a few months ago. Eventually, we made it back home but not before my heart broke a little more with the loss of the first dog I ever got to call mine. My family which includes myself, my husband, and two children had to move in with my husband's father. It was a one bedroom apartment and we all slept in the living room for almost a year. That first year home we struggled, my husband and I fought and almost lost each other in our anger and frustration, we didn't know if we would make it but we did. Something else happened that first year though and it happened to me. My mother is the reason it happened and I am still not sure if she knows that. She was talking to me about Jesus and she was happier than I had honestly seen or heard her be in a long time. I wanted to know more and I wanted to be happy. It was not overnight or a quick conversion for me. I learned a little and I read a little. I went to church with my parents. One day I was in the shower and I realized I wasn't sad anymore. I asked Jesus into my life in the shower in March of 2013(I am not sure of the exact date). It is a decision I have not regret. I still struggle sometimes. The different between then and now is that I understand that it isn't for me to do and I have to give it to Jesus. Sometimes I do that five times a day because human nature is to think you have to do it yourself. You don't. Lately, I have been trying to live in this world more than looking to my Savior and I have struggled. I know I shouldn't and I don't want to. I have to look up to Jesus and what awaits me with Him. It is so much more than this world has to offer. Even though I struggle, even though I slip, even though I backslide sometimes, even though I am not perfect He is and I am saved.